Eight hours of excruciating pain are finally over. Yes, yes the exam was indeed eight hours long and covered almost every “logy” you could think of – histology, periodontology, embryology, pathology, pharmacology blah blah blah blah…at this point I just want to forget it all – atleast till the time I hear if I passed or failed! The first part was considerably easier than the second one, but then everyone felt the same so maybe we will all pass! Lets see kya hota hai.

Lets get to bigger and better things at hand! Let me rewind a few weeks, when I announced the Divine Divas of Blogsville. So what is it?

The idea for Divine Divas of Blogsville sprung up on International Women’s Day when I read numerous posts about women, the essence of being a woman, and just how different this world would be if there were no women. I emailed most of the ladies I know in blogsville and asked them a series of questions and I have received several replies. Several remain. I also emailed the gentlemen in blogsville asking them to write a few words about the lovely ladies they know. Mind you, these are the people I know. So I might have missed many wonderful women out there and by no means are they any less special. The idea is to highlight the different aspects of a woman, the different roles she can assume, and how each and every one has something different to offer. After reading the replies that I received, I must say I was pretty surprised at how applaudable each and every one is!

Sushmita Sen was asked one final question before she was crowned Miss Universe about 12 years ago: “What is the essence of a woman?” I set out to seek the answer myself. It is easy to answer but so hard to fathom. The essence of a woman lies in her versatility. Her power to lead, her strength to love unconditionally, her compassion, her stylish makeovers, her traditional dresses, her Wall Street jobs, her household chores, her irrational emotions, her extremely logical outlook on life, and so much more – all of these are the essence of a woman. Take a look around at the women you know, each one has her own little place representing one or more of these things.

I quote Shirley Chislom here – “The emotional, sexual, and psychological stereotyping of females begins when the doctor says, ‘It’s a girl’.” I am sure we all know very well what she means. I have no intention of preaching equality or being overtly feminist. I merely want to present to you a few very special women about who they are in their own words. These women have atleast one distinct quality that sets them apart from the rest. The goal is to discuss women, what womanhood means to them, and what it means to you gentlemen out there. Just a fun little event! We have a little quiz too. I will be asking one question at the end of each post and the person to get most questions correct will get a special prize. Some questions might pertain to one of you – so you will definitely know the answer. Don’t worry, you get free points

Lets start off with our little curtain raiser about what you will hear from these women, and let me start it off.

Most of you know me as the girl from Utterances, and I go by Kaush. Whats in a name, they say? A lot, I know! I have been often mistaken to be a guy, especially in emails, online conversations; many a times I have gone to meetings, and have had honest queries as to why I am not a guy? I laugh it off, and generally don’t mind it. Supposedly, its more of a masculine name, but the female doctor at the hospital I was born at had the same name. So here I am.

A 20-something, I have been more of a rebel in most decisions I have made. I used to not understand why the guys in our society in Ahmedabad would play outside in the mud, while us girls stayed at home in the evenings playing “ghar ghar” with our barbie dolls. I love my dolls, but I also wanted to roll in the mud. There is one distinct event that I remember from that part of my childhood. I have no idea how old I was, but it was one of those evenings and I really wanted to play hop-skotch with the guys in the mud – most of whom are married now and probably dont even remember getting mad at me. So I went, and this guy said “chokrio thi naa rami shakaay” (girls cannot play). I screamed why not! One of the notorious guys said, “we eat mud, only if you eat mud.” Not to be left out, I stomped across to the play are where there was a bit of sand, took a little and put it in my mouth and chomped it off – smirking, showing them I wanted to play too. As luck would have it, my mom was just coming home from work and saw what her precious little angel (yea right) had done. She stormed towards me, shook all the bones within me, and slapped me hard! I was not supposed to eat mud. Gladly, she never said I was not supposed to play with guys. I did from then on. I had done it – my first rebellion. Just a random memory from childhood.

Spoiled rotten by my dad, for most of my childhood I got everything I ever wanted without even asking. I was probably the one where my parents got most training in child care. But things became hard for the family during my mid teen years. I grew up pretty fast in those years, and learnt a lot. Most people I know tell me I act too old for my age, but maybe its going through those hard times that taught me a lot. Moving to America taught me even more, so much that this blog would run out of space. I have been doing taxes for my family since then. Never was I reminded that I was girl, or I wasnt told to do something just because I was a girl. In fact, I was asked to do everything that traditionally a guy would do. I would whine but one day dad said, “thats coz you are not our daughter, you are our son.” I was elated. I did not know if I wanted to be happy because I was placed on the same high pedestal that sons are placed on in our society, where we are not just a transitory member of the family. Or, should I be ashamed that I hadn’t been that docile daughter that I should have been? I even asked, “why, a girl cant do the same things?”

Here is my query for the day, why do we usually stereo type certain roles to certain genders? Sure, thats normal. But when a guy cries we say ” you are such a girl” or when a girl is rebellious, she is a tomboy. So, aren’t guys allowed to have their emotions break free? or are girls not supposed to be outspoken, and confident? Its hard to run away from it, and its the way society is in general.

Here are two comments from three very different people, who know me in three very different ways (gemini hoon – gotta have twin personalities naa). I did not ask for it, but they were kind enough to boost my ego a little with their wonderful words.

Deepak: “one of my bestest friends in blogsville, fun loving and share the most comfy friendship – no hangups, no uptight behavior, casual…and can share any and every silly or profound joke or thought!” (you are da best DJ – and yes, I have put up with many such jokes! Sigh)
Ricky: ” How could I miss you…LOL. You are one of my first friends in the blog-world. You were also my first gujju friend (like ever). You are very passionate about your work which is always a good thing. Your work with NGOs in India is very inspirational. You are very out-going, fun-loving and geniune girl. You have a lot to look forward in life. You are a good friend.” (thanks ricky – atleast now your interest in gujju gals has gone up)
Vicky: ab aapke bare mein kya kahein. hehe.
good friend who is now gods knows where and god knows doing what.
amazing love story. (yea right Vicky – you know a lot about me! )

So ladies, brace yourselves – there is a lot of praise coming your way

Quote of the day: ” Men are taught to apologize for their weaknesses, women for their strengths.” ~Lois Wyse

Stereotype is word of the day. Your thoughts?

Quiz question: Who came up with the name “Divine Divas of Blogsville”?
Hint: Someone on my “Coffee Buds” list.
Email answers to utterances (at) gmail (dot) com by April 3rd with Subject line ” Q1″

If you have not received an email about this and would lik e one, email me and I will send you one. Slowly but surely

I was going to publish a little curtain raiser post today about DDoB but decided that it would be best to postpone it until the end of this month. First of all, I provided several participants with a very short deadline and even then a few of you responded and I am very grateful for that but to make it fun, I would love to have everyone’s responses before I start, so I shall wait so that we all have more time. Second and more importantly, I have one exam looming in 10 days, even though it is just one it is very important..its my national boards for licensure. I apologize for the delay but it will be a whole lot more fun if I am able to give my full attention to DDoB. I have already prepared the quiz questions Once again, if you have not received an email, let me know and I shall send you one It will officially and for sure start on March 28, 10:00 pm EST

Until then, I would like to introduce you all to my kitchen!!! Yes yes, I have had that blog for three months now but I never officially introduced it. There has been a link on the side bar for a long time but I just never mentioned it in a post. Some of you have made it there and have realized that its true to its name – my experiments with rasoi ;). Do read the intro post.

So here’s presenting – My Experiments with Rasoi – Improvements, suggestions, and recipes WELCOME!

Another update: Pick of the week is back from Rediffblog days! Sometimes its pick of the “month” but ..y aknow

Also, know how I have time and again written about my phone bill and how my dad always confronts me but never has taken the phone away? Well, I came up with another little song for the rising phone bills…yeh kab khatam hoge…sigh!

Main aur mere dad
aksar yeh baatein karte hai
phone ka bill kam hota toh kaisa hota

main yeh gaadi kharidta, tum woh dress kharidti
mere baal kuch zyaada hote, meri taal kuch kam hoti
main tumhaari phone usage se hairan hota
phone ka bill kam hota toh kaisa hota…..

main aur mere dad
aksar yeh baatien karte hai
yeh “B” hai yaa uska nasha tumhe hai
yeh baatein itni kyu hamesha hoti rehti hai
Reliance ka card itna kyu use hota hai
Ambanis ko tumhaari baaton se itna paise kyu milta rehta hai

Hai bill se mujhe shikayat
yaa B ki baaton se main hairaan hoon
Hai yeh bill kyu itna lamba
Iska tax return kya main bhar sakta hoon?

ye phone company ki fraud billing hai
ya Reliance phone cards ki koi trick
yeh pattiyo ki kyu hui sarsaraahat
mere kaano main phone ki bajti hai aahat

yeh sochte hai mere dad kabse gumsum
ke jabke unko bhi yeh khabar hai
ke B nahi hai…. kahi nahi hai
magar mera phone hai ki proof deta rehta hai
ke woh yahi hai..yahi kahi hai

Bill bharne ki ye aadat, meri bhi hai uski bhi
kadki thodi idhar bhi hai udhar bhi

baat karne ko bahot kuch hai par kaise kare hum
kab tak phone pe baatien karte rahe hum…
dil kehta hai reliance kabhi free bhi karvaade!
yeh phone ke bill jo badh rahe hai unhe katva de
hum saath main rehlete hai, dad ko bata de
batade ke haan humko mohabbat hai..mohabbat hai
aur yeh phone ke bill idhar bhi hai … udhar bhi

yeh kahaaan aa gaye hum, yunhi phone pe baat karte
apni baaton se hai jaanam,saade phone ke bill badhte
yeh kahaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa aa gaye hum…

Sigh.

Holi Hai! These words are the highlight of March among Indians and here is wishing you all a very happy and colorful holi. Do enjoy it to the fullest.

Gone are the days when I used to go perform pooja at the holi bonfire and then play with colors the next day all day. Made gulaal filled water balloons and threw them from the 6th floor and musta have gotten numerous expletives addressed to me that I never heard

This holi is different. I worked all day, studied, and here writing this post. Saw five greetings that B sent me. Its no fun celebrating holi without him. I mean even if I celebrate it with family and friends, it wont be the same – there will always be something missing without him. I absolutely cannot wait till we can celebrate holi together sometime, we have NEVER done that before. But then, we have not done a lot of things together yet. So while we were talking on the phone today, we decided that once we get married we will have a holi bash for family and friends each year. so there! thats one more reason for you guys to pray that we get married soon so you all can come celebrate holi with us Deepak, you keep the cokes errrrr bhaang ready

I spent this past weekend visiting 6 states while spending atleast two hours in each. Yes yes, Noth carolina, Virginia, Maryland, Delaware, Pennsylvania, New Jersey and ofcourse District of Columbia Going to NJ was accidental. We got lost driving in Philly and got onto Ben Franklin bridge, only to realize that we were in NJ as soon as we crossed the bridge! We had to pay the toll when we returned back to Philly. Yea what is UP with these tolls. There was a place where we had to pay $5 at a toll! Sheeeeez! Visited Philadelphia for the first time and it was a delight. Almost felt like mini-NY. Loads of stuff to do and very historical Must see place for all – will try to write details. Spent Sunday in Washington DC – my second time there. Not as exciting as the first one but very realxing. Walked outside GW Bush’s residence once again – sigh! He was in coz the flag was high up, took some pictures and left without seeing him. I am sure he was dissappointed!;);) However, the highlight of the DC trip was St. Patrick’s Day parade! It was a delight….I have some videos from there too. I will put em up soon. Until then, if you do not have Quicktime player, do download it coz you will need it to see the pics

Divine Divas of Blogsville — aaah where do I start?

All ladies and gentlemen out there have received an email. If you have not, let me know and I will send you one. A curtain raiser post shall be up this Friday. The little “event” will start Sunday and will be presented as a series of post every three-four days. There will also be a quiz and the winner shall receive a special prize – more details on that later.

One another note, my parents have not yet given the green signal for B and me (in case all of you were wondering). God knows when that will happen. Sometimes I think being busy is good for the both of us, because thats just less time to ponder over how hard it is without each other. On the flip side, after a long, busy day it would just be nice and a stress reliever to fall in the arms of the one and share the day’s happenings with him. Mera number kab aayega? Sigh.

How many of us hate our gooey mouths and brush our teeth first thing in the morning? Many, I am sure. Last night, during a chat, Deepak told me that he had just woken up, brushed his teeth and had his chai. My immediate response was to ask him why he hadn’t had his chai first and then brushed his teeth? To this he asked me, quite surprised, if I had my chai before brushing my teeth. My answer: yes!

Most of us, as a part of growing up, are taught to brush our teeth as soon as we wake up. Why? Have you ever asked yourselves? It is pretty obvious, y0u might say. The mouth smells bad due to all the bacterial action from the night before and the teeth need to be cleaned for a fresh mouth first thing in the morning. True I say, but does it make sense to clean our mouths first thing in the morning and then immediately proceed to have breakfast, thus reinviting all the bacteria that we had just brushed away?

If the point of brushing was to have a fresh breath and removal of foul smell, then any mouthwash would do. However, the point of brushing, as I see it, is to clean the mouth completely – to free our teeth from food particles, plaque, and bacteria to maintain a healthy oral environment. So if that is the point of brushing, what is the point of eating breakfast right after that morning brush?

All my life I grew up with this routine – wake up, brush, chai/bournvita, a little breakfast and off to school. Kids nowadays also brush their teeth at night. Great! However, after studying and pursuing dental hygiene, and after several debates on when to brush in the morning, I have started advising patients, friends, and family to brush after breakfast. I would like to present my argument here!

Our mouth has a dynamic environment and harbours more bacteria, good and bad, than you can ever think of. Eating different kinds of food constantly change the acidity in our mouths and as food gets trapped in between our teeth, it invites bacteria to settle there and multiply. Sugars produce an acidic coating over our teeth which make the enamel of our teeth susceptible to decay. After food is trapped for a few hours, it turns into the white sticky goo that you see in the morning called plaque. Foul smell also sometimes arises from the plaque staying put in the same place for longer periods of time. The tongue constantly cleanses our mouth but we also produce saliva which can be both good and bad. Good because when we talk and chew, saliva acts as a self cleanser. Bad because when we are asleep, this still saliva acts as a sort of glue for the plaque to stick even harder on our teeth – to put it simply. To keep our teeth and gums healthy and free of such decay and disease causing bacteria, it thus becomes imperative to keep our teeth free from such food debris, especially those that get stuck in the tiny spaces in between our teeth. How do we do it? Brush and floss.

We eat different meals throughout the day. Imagine the amount of acid and sugar production going on in our mouths the whole day – undisturbed till we brush at night. For some of us, till we brush the next morning. We wake up the next morning and brush to disrupt the little colonies that they have formed. Then we have breakfast. And then we proceed through the whole day eating – not worrying about the mini-party these bacteria are having in our mouths.

If you feel the strong urge to brush right after you wake up because you cannot stand the gooey feeling, then do a quick rinse with water. However, brush only after you have had your breakfast. Imagine cleaning your teeth and then sticking those bread crumbs, or paratha, or bagels, or omlette, or even the sugars in your chai in between your teeth. What a nice layer of fodder for bacteria! Brushing after this morning tea or breakfast will ensure that your teeth remain clean and free of food, thus less fodder for bacteria to multiply. As simple as that!

I remember telling little kids that if they did not brush at night, the germs will attack the food from the whole day and have a party in their mouth throughout the night. Sleeping with a clean mouth ensures that bacteria that now have a still environment without all the tongue and saliva movement do not get much fodder to multiply. So brushing at night is also important. But if you MUST brush only once a day then after breakfast is the way to go.

Moreover, brushing after breakfast ensures that the fluoride and therapeutic substances in your toothpaste have a clean sugar free enviroment to act on – atleast till lunch time If you do not see light in this little argument do attack me with questions. While I am not a licensed dental professional yet, and this might not be expert advise – I do believe in educating the public! If ya know whats going on in your mouth, you will be in a better position to make an informed decision about when to brush your teeth! If this was confusing as heck or if you have a better argument against brushing teeth after breakfast do let me know – I will check my facts up.

Here is to healthy teeth. My crowning glory – B and my little brother cannot go to bed without brushing their teeth at night anymore. B who laughed at me when I first asked him to brush after breakfast, now cannot leave the house without brushing after breakfast Needless to say, I too brush after the morning tea and bread-butter

It has been more than a month since I updated this blog. I disappeared from the face of blogsville, came back for a weekend, and then disappeared again for a week. Yes dear friends, I am here to answer the question – where was I?

In the rural parts of the state with no internet access. Yes yes, I have finally had a taste of what life is like without any internet. Actually, pretty nice. it was like a nice getaway to a place where I knew noone: in a free apartment provided by the education comission that was fabulously furnished, and working with children that ranged from 1 – 18 years in age! I was on my rotations for the whole month of February cleaning little kids’ teeth, putting sealants on their teeth, talking to their parents, going to rural schools and assisting in screenings, observing osteoo-somethin surgery, attending meetings, visiting dentists in the locality, and doing everything related to dental hygine and pediatrics! Remember my OR experience on the Gujju new year and that things we do on New Years happen all year round? Well guess what? I got another chance to be in the OR this month. However, I was not allowed to touch the patient at all this time since it was a private hospital. Overall, I had a great time and got loads of experience working with children.

Children! Ah, where do I begin? They are the easiest and the hardest to work with. So many children stand out that I do not know where to begin and talk about each one I met. Let me start with the youngest.

I had the privilege of being the FIRST dental professional a little girl saw when she had just turned one! I went out to the waiting room, called her name, and in came her parents, and her sister carrying the little baby. We sat her in the chair. She was pretty intimated at the sigh of this huge chair. I smiled, talked to the little cutie for two seconds
“Hi sweetie” brought the cutest smile on her face. Then we sat her down in the chair and I showed her the toothbrush. She took it – maybe she liked the colors on it. I asked the mother if she had tried brushing with the girl, and the answer was negative. So this was really the first time that her oral health was being evaluated. I proceeded to put on my gloves, mask, and eye wear all the while smiling at her, reassuring her. But ofcourse, all the cover up probably made me look like a rogue about to attack her. I could see fright in her eyes, and then she looked at her parents who smiled back and reassured her. The mother took pictures when I first opened her mouth and looked at her – chronicled her life and first visit to the dentist! She did not let me brush her teeth and started crying. No luck. The dentist came in, and we had to hold her down to check her teeth. She cried and screamed, which I must say was great because it kept her mouth open She might not remember, but I will always remember her first visit to the dentist!

Surprisingly, the very next patient was also seeing a dentist for the first time. He was two and the most adorable boy, much more cooperative. Another delight!

Another boy that stands out was 15 years old. Poor guy bore me cleaning his teeth for half an hour and then I said, “Buddy, we gotta do five sealants on you now” I heard the loudest groan ever! I said, ” aww comon, it will be quick and look at the bright sides, you dont have to come back for six months after that.” — “oh allright” was the half-convinced reply. I had a very difficult time doing sealants on him because they were in his very back teeth on the top which are very hard to reach. Yet, he was a trooper and stayed calm and patient tilting his head up everytime I asked him to. His mother, when I finally called her in to talk, said, “wow I didnt know you did sealants too, i was wondering why it took so long.”
The best part: the dentist checked the sealants and said they were excellent!

Then there was the five year old who just would not sit still. A little bit of cajoling and smiling did not work so I said firmly, “Will you please sit still and cooperate with me so that I can give you the prize at the end?” His cute reply – “Oh you are much better looking than the other lady.” How could I have not smiled at this now? Then he just kept talking, and I let him for a few minutes.
“You look like my brother’s girlfriend.”
Me: “Oh really? ”
“uh huh”
Me: “but I am not ”
“do you have a boyfriend?”
Me, rolling my eyes…sheeez kids nowadays! “yes I do”
“whats his name?”
Me: “why do you wanna know”
“I just wanna…whats his name?”
Me: “ohhhh comon, you dont wanna know”
Then all of a sudden he touched my earring and said: “Oh these earrings are nice, where did you get them?”
Little flirt!!!
Me: “aww thanks! My boyfriend gave them to me”
“Yea, whats his name?”
Me: “hahah you are never gonna know! Now comon, lets sit still so I can let you go home quickly. Will you help me?”
“uh huh”
He was the littlest, most precious flirt, and still wouldnt sit still. It was a miracle I was able to work on his teeth.

There were soo many more beautiful moments I shared with these kids and I could write a book, but I shall spare ye and write this one that stood out the most!
Six year old girl.
Okay sweety, we are going to take some pictures of your teeth.
–”Does it hurt?”
No! Not at all. I wouldnt hurt you ever, look… its easy. You bite on this little thing and I will put my big camera next to your cheek and count till five and you will be done.
–”okay”
I tried putting the film in her mouth for her x-rays but she started crying. I tried little nice talk but she kept crying.
honey you gotta tell me why you are crying. You just cant cry and not tell me why
–”It hurts”
No sweety, look its easy. It will take two seconds.
After much cajoling I got her to let me take a few x-rays which actually came out pretty well.
Then I proceeded to look at her teeth and use my explorer to check for pits and fissures in her teeth. She saw this sharp instrument and flinched even before it entered her mouth.
–”WHATS THATTTTTTTTTTTTT”
Its my little mirror and little helper that helps me check your teeth.
–”It huuuuuurrrrrrrrrrttttttttttttttttttttttsssssssss”
Trust me ladies and gentlemen, I hadnt even put it in her mouth.
Okay sweety, open your mouth.
–”I dont want to”
Open please
–”i dont want to”
Now I had to be a little harsh with her.
Listen sweety, you dont tell the dentist that you dont want to. You do what they ask you. I am only going to help you okay?
I got a nod.
So lets not say you dont want to. Lets do it. Take this tissue and wipe those tears off please.
I worked on her and when I finished “See that wasnt bad, you were crying for no reason”
She just nodded. Then the dentist came in to check my work. And she asked the little girl, so what grade do you give to Ms. K for working on your teeth. An “A” or a “B”
Even after all the crying and my harsh words she said “A+” and hugged me before she left!

I learnt loads in the past few weeks, the most important thing I learnt: Children have cavities and when they do, they have LOADS! I will update you guys a little more later on. But I am back at my apartment and have internet access!! Yay!